| Result of wires down in a blizzard? | 35 |
| Result of whipping? | 19 |
| Result of wearing high heels? | 29 |
| Result of wearing and then removing a hat? | 42 |
| Result of way too much praise? | 30 |
| Result of waxy build-up? | 24 |
| Result of waving two feet in the air? | 37 |
| Result of watchmaker/pharmacist union? | 38 |
| Result of washing political dirty laundry? | 42 |
| Result of walking the lead-off batter | 37 |
| Result of walking into a door, perhaps | 38 |
| Result of vitamin B12 deficiency | 32 |
| Result of venting? | 18 |
| Result of vandalism | 19 |
| Result of using the wrong key | 29 |
| Result of using the wrong film speed, maybe | 43 |
| Result of using plastic | 23 |
| Result of using English the right way? | 38 |
| Result of using elbow grease | 28 |
| Result of using a toxic girdle? | 31 |
| Result of using a StairMaster, possibly | 39 |
| Result of use | 13 |
| Result of unwise dining | 23 |
| Result of two-putting, perhaps | 30 |
| Result of two people interrupting each other? | 45 |
| Result of two cuts, maybe | 25 |
| Result of turning the corner? | 29 |
| Result of tummy rubbing? | 24 |
| Result of tribesmen putting their heads together? | 49 |
| Result of trauma, maybe | 23 |
| Result of touching poison ivy | 29 |
| Result of too much V.O.? | 24 |
| Result of too much TV, it's said | 36 |
| Result of too much suds? | 24 |
| Result of too much Molson on Boxing Day? | 40 |
| Result of too much filing by the manicurist? | 44 |
| Result of too much exercise | 27 |
| Result of too much cabin pressure? | 34 |
| Result of too many rusty nails on the road? | 43 |
| Result of too many missed payments, briefly | 43 |
| Result of too many falls | 24 |
| Result of throwing in the towel: Abbr. | 38 |
| Result of throwing in the towel, briefly | 40 |
| Result of throwing french fries in the spin cycle? | 50 |
| Result of three strikes | 23 |
| Result of thiamine deficiency | 29 |
| Result of the old sawing a lady in half routine? | 48 |
| Result of the Manhattan Project | 31 |
| Result of The Hulk's first press conference? | 48 |
| Result of the fruit truck never arriving at the senior center? | 62 |
| Result of the dog getting into the shoe closet, perhaps? | 56 |
| Result of the Camp David Accords | 32 |
| Result of Thanksgiving dinner? | 30 |
| Result of testing tea temperature? | 34 |
| Result of teasing? | 18 |
| Result of teasing, perhaps | 26 |
| Result of tatting, perhaps | 26 |
| Result of tanning | 17 |
| Result of taking "I'll eat my hat" literally? | 59 |
| Result of surplus oil? | 22 |
| Result of supersizing a burger order? | 37 |
| Result of submarine activity | 28 |
| Result of stress, it's been said | 36 |
| Result of stream erosion | 24 |
| Result of steam-pressing | 24 |
| Result of static | 16 |
| Result of stalling | 18 |
| Result of stagehands going on strike? | 37 |
| Result of squeezing, maybe | 26 |
| Result of splitting hairs? | 26 |
| Result of someone yelling "Fire!" in a crowded theater? | 65 |
| Result of some time in a bed? | 29 |
| Result of some talks | 20 |
| Result of some successful pitches | 33 |
| Result of some sprees | 21 |
| Result of some showers | 22 |
| Result of some sandbagging | 26 |
| Result of some refinement | 25 |
| Result of some plotting | 23 |
| Result of some oil deposits | 27 |
| Result of some joke-shop powders | 32 |
| Result of some hovering | 23 |
| Result of some heavy petting? | 29 |
| Result of some heavy lifting | 28 |
| Result of some financial transactions | 37 |
| Result of some fermentation | 27 |
| Result of some digit-sucking? | 29 |
| Result of some deals | 20 |
| Result of some court bargaining | 31 |
| Result of some brainstorming | 28 |
| Result of some bites | 20 |
| Result of some bathing | 22 |
| Result of some bargaining | 25 |
| Result of some arm-twisting? | 28 |
| Result of solitary sorrow | 25 |
| Result of soft-palate vibration | 31 |
| Result of sleeping in, e.g. | 27 |
| Result of six outs | 18 |
| Result of sitting on a court bench too long? | 44 |
| Result of sitting in the front row of a movie theater, perhaps | 62 |